2005: The Year of Blindsiding Laurel
Dec. 31st, 2005 07:49 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sailorhathorYou know how a day can start off normal, regular, and kind of good. You think it's going to go like any other day. Just fine and peachy. Then something happens that makes you turn a complete 360. All you can do is adjust. You don't see it coming. You go into a bit of shock. Slowly, but surely, life continues, and you do what you have to do.
2005 has been like that for me.
I thought 2004 was bad enough. Then, my days started off normal and ended with me running for my life, calling the police, and reporting not one, but two muggers, one who could have put *me* in the ground.
Instead, the year ends with someone else being put in the ground. 2005 was not through blindsiding me with unexpected shocks. It had to get in one more before that big shiny ball drops tonight.
Last night, after 11pm, my phone rings. This is not normal, unless I am expecting a call from a friend. I thought uh oh, someone's in the hospital. It's Linda, my brother's wife.
Her words were, "I'm sorry to call so late. Laurel, your daddy died tonight."
It's a shock, but not a shock. He wasn't in the best of health. But I really thought he was going to last another five cantankerous years and drive everyone crazy. I was making plans. I thought maybe I could rent a motorized wheelchair for him and take him with me whenever I visit Mexico for one day to do some shopping, a trip I am planning for sometime this year, once I figure out which city would be good for shopping where Greyhound goes. That was something my dad and I loved to do together, buy heaps of cheap, fun Mexican crap. ^_^ He kinda seemed to want to go when I told him about it. He kept asking me when I was going. I thought maybe I could surprise him. I'm still not used to the idea that such plans are now cancelled. I'm not used to the idea that I can't call him anymore. I'm not used to the idea that I wil never be able to pass on another corny joke to him, and hear him chuckle and say how he was going to pass that one on.
I'm walking in a dream right now. Still in shock. I think he might've had an inkling that the end was near, and that's why it was so important to him to make sure everyone got Christmas presents this year, no matter what. I'm glad I got to see him one last holiday. I only wish I could have known so I could have hugged him a little longer when I left. But he knew I loved him. I know that.
All the plans are being made right now. Linda said I should write up anything that I would like for the minister to say at the service, to include in the eulogy. This is the thing that makes me happiest. He was a curmudgeon, stoical man, kinda like Fred Mertz, but he was my daddy and he loved me. I want everyone to know how I feel about him.
While I was pacing the kitchen, thinking of what I wanted to put in the eulogy, something moved in my kitchen of its own accord. I'm glad you can hear me, Daddy.
2005 has been like that for me.
I thought 2004 was bad enough. Then, my days started off normal and ended with me running for my life, calling the police, and reporting not one, but two muggers, one who could have put *me* in the ground.
Instead, the year ends with someone else being put in the ground. 2005 was not through blindsiding me with unexpected shocks. It had to get in one more before that big shiny ball drops tonight.
Last night, after 11pm, my phone rings. This is not normal, unless I am expecting a call from a friend. I thought uh oh, someone's in the hospital. It's Linda, my brother's wife.
Her words were, "I'm sorry to call so late. Laurel, your daddy died tonight."
It's a shock, but not a shock. He wasn't in the best of health. But I really thought he was going to last another five cantankerous years and drive everyone crazy. I was making plans. I thought maybe I could rent a motorized wheelchair for him and take him with me whenever I visit Mexico for one day to do some shopping, a trip I am planning for sometime this year, once I figure out which city would be good for shopping where Greyhound goes. That was something my dad and I loved to do together, buy heaps of cheap, fun Mexican crap. ^_^ He kinda seemed to want to go when I told him about it. He kept asking me when I was going. I thought maybe I could surprise him. I'm still not used to the idea that such plans are now cancelled. I'm not used to the idea that I can't call him anymore. I'm not used to the idea that I wil never be able to pass on another corny joke to him, and hear him chuckle and say how he was going to pass that one on.
I'm walking in a dream right now. Still in shock. I think he might've had an inkling that the end was near, and that's why it was so important to him to make sure everyone got Christmas presents this year, no matter what. I'm glad I got to see him one last holiday. I only wish I could have known so I could have hugged him a little longer when I left. But he knew I loved him. I know that.
All the plans are being made right now. Linda said I should write up anything that I would like for the minister to say at the service, to include in the eulogy. This is the thing that makes me happiest. He was a curmudgeon, stoical man, kinda like Fred Mertz, but he was my daddy and he loved me. I want everyone to know how I feel about him.
While I was pacing the kitchen, thinking of what I wanted to put in the eulogy, something moved in my kitchen of its own accord. I'm glad you can hear me, Daddy.
