killcrushdestroy
Aug. 13th, 2006 10:42 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sailorhathorWhy am I so fucking IRRITABLE today? I know work is partially to blame. Overabundance of dumbass calls. Spoke to some woman who kept me on the phone for 18 minutes while she had me spell *everything,* even simple words like the street the bus station was on. D-I-V-I-S-I-O-N. I swear there was something permanently stupid about that woman. She wanted to know about a bus going to Blytheville, AR, and needed me to spell the city for her. I did. "P-L-I-D..." No, B as in Boy, L as in Larry, Y as in Yellow, T as in Tom..." "P-L-Y-B...?" NO DUMBASS, what does T as in Tom mean?! LISTEN BEFORE I KILL YOU THROUGH THE PHONE WITH MY AMAZING MIND POWERS. We went back and forth like this, I swear to God, at least four times. And that wasn't the only call that lasted over seven minutes with people asking me dumbass questions and needing to know every last detail about the bus schedule including when the driver was going to make them pee and feed them by hand. I HATE MY BORING IRRITATING AS FUCK JOB.
So, I'm going to apply for another one. A position has opened up in another department that is something like Accident Statistic Specialist (keeping track of Grey Dawg demolition derbies) and I'm actually qualified for it, pretty much. I'm going to apply for it. Wish me luck! Finally, I'll GET OFF THE GODDAMN PHONES!
In other news, Snakes on a Plane has got to be the most uninspired title for a movie ever. They couldn't come up with something better than the most literal title? What if all movies were named this way?
Single White Female would be Clingy, Crazy Bitch Who Masturbates With the Door Open
Scream would be The Killers Are the Hot Boyfriend and His Rubber-Faced Gay Lover
Devour would be The Only Reason to Watch This is For Jensen Playing a Hot Prince of Darkness, Fangirls!
Ride with the Devil would be Long-Haired Puppy and Look, Kaye, Jonathon Brandis! (okay, a little too specific for the general public...)
Independence Day would be Okay, Yeah, a Little Stereotypey, but Look! Cool Explosions! And Will Smith is Funny!
The Ring would be Another Little White Girl Fell Down a Well (thank you Scary Movie - hey, another very literal title!)
Milo and Otis would be Awwwwwwwwwwwwww Cute Puppy and Kitty, Makes You Wanna Die They're So Cute, Movie
Valentine would be David Boreanaz Can't Act
The Toolbox Murders would be... The Toolbox Murders (although an alternate title would be Oh My God is That Will Marshall Setting That Dude on Fire?!)
The Pink Panther (2006) would be No One Saw This
I'll stop there 'cause I got stuff to do.
So, I'm going to apply for another one. A position has opened up in another department that is something like Accident Statistic Specialist (keeping track of Grey Dawg demolition derbies) and I'm actually qualified for it, pretty much. I'm going to apply for it. Wish me luck! Finally, I'll GET OFF THE GODDAMN PHONES!
In other news, Snakes on a Plane has got to be the most uninspired title for a movie ever. They couldn't come up with something better than the most literal title? What if all movies were named this way?
Single White Female would be Clingy, Crazy Bitch Who Masturbates With the Door Open
Scream would be The Killers Are the Hot Boyfriend and His Rubber-Faced Gay Lover
Devour would be The Only Reason to Watch This is For Jensen Playing a Hot Prince of Darkness, Fangirls!
Ride with the Devil would be Long-Haired Puppy and Look, Kaye, Jonathon Brandis! (okay, a little too specific for the general public...)
Independence Day would be Okay, Yeah, a Little Stereotypey, but Look! Cool Explosions! And Will Smith is Funny!
The Ring would be Another Little White Girl Fell Down a Well (thank you Scary Movie - hey, another very literal title!)
Milo and Otis would be Awwwwwwwwwwwwww Cute Puppy and Kitty, Makes You Wanna Die They're So Cute, Movie
Valentine would be David Boreanaz Can't Act
The Toolbox Murders would be... The Toolbox Murders (although an alternate title would be Oh My God is That Will Marshall Setting That Dude on Fire?!)
The Pink Panther (2006) would be No One Saw This
I'll stop there 'cause I got stuff to do.
