Most useless. Prompt table. Ever.

[sailorhathor]

Claim for fc_smorgasbord.

Multi-fandom. Fandoms claimed: Supernatural, Miracles, Sailor Moon, The Initiation (1984), John Carpenter's Vampires and Vampires: Los Muertos, Degrassi, Little House on the Prairie (TV 1974), Land of the Lost (1974), The Uninvited (US Movie), Scream, Devour, The Ring, and Dark Angel.

Thanks to tvsgrady and mooserat for helping me make this table by participating in all my Simpsons Quote fests. XD

1.	Sweet, nourishing gruel!	2.	We'll get him drunk and drag him out of town. Just like we did with Laura Ingalls Wilder!	3.	Ohhh, why must my actions have consequences?!	4.	That'll learn 'im to bust my tomater.	5.	Can't murder now. Eating.
6.	You mean I shaved my bikini zone for nothing?	7.	Stupid sexy Flanders!	8.	Lies make baby Jesus cry.	9.	Pain is the cleanser, pain is the cleanser!	10.	Can't sleep. Clown'll eat me.
11.	This plot made no sense! Tell the people!	12.	But Aquaman, you cannot marry a woman without gills! You're from two different worlds!	13.	"You can do it Otto, you can do it Otto. Help each other out, that'll be our motto." "Make this spare, I give you free gelato." "Then back to my place where I will get you blotto." "Domo arigato, Mister Roboto!"	14.	MY EYES! THE GOGGLES DO NOTHING!	15.	"Rod. Todd. This is God. Bring forth all the cookies from your kitchen and put them on the Simpson's porch." "But those cookies belong to our parents..." "Do you want a vengeful God or a happy God?" "HappyGod!" "Then quit flappin' your lips and make with the cookies."
16.	I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.	17.	Oh, why does my death keep coming back to haunt me?	18.	When are they gonna get to the fireworks factory?!	19.	Bed goes up, bed goes down, bed goes up, bed goes down.	20.	Shut up Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-Tip!
21.	"Stupid bug! You go squish now!"	22.	I bent my wookie.	23.	Hot stuff, comin' throoooough...	24.	Sweetie, you seem blue. Did the last of something die?	25.	"I thought it was just a name." "What he meant was, Monster Island is actually a peninsula!"
26.	"Sir, people see you as something of an ogre." "They do?! I'll club them and eat their bones!"	27.	"What do you think, Marge? All I need is a title. I was thinking along the lines of... no TV and no beer make Homer something something." "Go crazy?" "Don't mind if I do!"	28.	This is like something out of that twilighty show about that zone.	29.	"Grandpa, how do you sleep at night?!" "They drug us."	30.	To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.
31.	Must... drop... pantaloons...	32.	"Bart, stop creating a diversion and get out of here!"	33.	That's it Marge, he knows the whole hot dog song. Go ahead, sleep with him. I'll just take a lock of hair to remember you by. It's just you and me now, lock of hair.	34.	Attempted murder! Now honestly, what is that? Do they give a Nobel Prize for attempted chemistry?	35.	I'm not a supergenius. Or are I?
36.	"She's better than me at everything that makes me special."	37.	"Does Mr. Simpson have a demon, Daddy?" "Hmm, looks that way. Go and get Daddy's exorcism tongs." "Yaaaay!"	38.	For lucky best wash use Mr. Sparkle. He banishes dirt to the land of wind and ghosts!	39.	American jerks are going home Now we sleep for a thousand years When we wake, the world will end	40.	Big Brother Representative: "Now, Mr. Simpson, may I ask why you're here?" Homer's Brain: "Don't say revenge... don't say revenge..." Homer: "Ummm... revenge?" Homer's Brain: "Okay, that's it, I'm outta here." *Step step step step, SLAM!*
41.	Homer, a man who called himself "You-know-who" just invited you to a secret "wink-wink" at the "you-know-what."	42.	"You're not gonna ask me to pose nude, are you?" "Well, yes. Unless you have issues about revealing your body." "I don't, but the block association does. They wanted a 'traditional' Santa Claus."	43.	Old Man: "Take this doll, but beware! It carries a terrible curse." Homer: "Oooh, that's bad." Old Man: "But it comes with a free serving of frozen yogurt!" Homer: "That's good!" Old Man: "The frozen yogurt is also cursed." Homer: "That's bad." Old Man: "But it comes with your choice of toppings!" Homer: "That's good!" Old Man: "The toppings contain potassium benzoate!" Homer: "........" Old Man: "That's bad." Homer: "...Can I go now?"	44.	o/` I've got that joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart Where? Down in my heart today And if the devil doesn't like it, he can sit on a tack Ouch! Sit on a tack Ouch! o/`	45.	My demons and I are closer than ever.
46.	Me fail English? That's unpossible!	47.	Fighting only makes it tighter.	48.	Why do people run from me?	49.	You're like my mommy after her box of wine.	50.	Dying tickles!
51.	So... do you like............ stuff?	52.	At my house, we call them "Uh-ohs."	53.	"We're doomed! Doomed, I tells ya!"	54.	What is your fascination with my forbidden closet of mystery?	55.	I'm a torso!
56.	He's got a board with a nail in it! Run!	57.	Iron helps us play!	58.	...then just call me a big old caveman. If they existed. Which they didn't!	59.	"He's gaining on us!" "I'm scared!" "Come on Neddy, move this thing!" "I can't, it's a Geo!"	60.	I'm happy AND ANGRY!
61.	I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T! I mean S-M-A-R-T...	62.	Woohoo!	63.	S-U-C-E-E-S-S, that's the way you spell success!	64.	"Can't talk now. Maintaining a state of cat-like readiness."	65.	The dead have risen... and they're voting Republican...
66.	Hello Smithers, you're quite good at turning me on.	67.	I can't believe it. Jerry Springer didn't solve our conflict.	68.	Holy flurking schnit!	69.	Amanda Hugnkiss? I need Amanda Hugnkiss! Oh why can't I find Amanda Hugnkiss?	70.	"Maybe there is no moral to this story." "Nah. It's just a bunch of stuff that happened."
71.	"Let's just agree to disagree." "I don't agree to that." "Neither do I."	72.	"Oh Lisa, you and your stories. Bart's a vampire, beer kills brain cells. Now let's go back to that... building... thingie... where our beds and TV... are."	73.	Do you even remember when you lost your passion for this job?	74.	I can't believe he acted completely in character.	75.	"In case you couldn't tell, I was being sarcastic." "Well, duh."
76.	"Okay Brain, I don't like you, and you don't like me, but let's just get through this and I can get back to killing you with beer." "It's a deal!"	77.	That oughta hold the little S.O.B.'s.	78.	Mmmmm... forbidden donut...	79.	"I suggest you leave immediately." "Or what? You'll release the dogs or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at you?"	80.	"Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try."
81.	"That's my swingset, and that's my sandbox. I'm not allowed to go in the deep end. And this is where I met the leprechaun." "Right, the leprechaun." "He told me to burn things."	82.	"Number 8." *Burp!* "Number 8." *Burp!* "Number 8." *Burp!*	83.	"Why don't those stupid idiots let me in their crappy club for jerks?"	84.	And now, what we all came here to see - hardcore nudity!	85.	"Hello, my name is Barney Gumble, and I'm an alcoholic." "Mr. Gumble, this is a Girl Scout meeting." "Is it, or is it you girls can't admit that you have a problem?"
86.	Aaah! Natural light! Get it off me! Get it off me!	87.	Urge to kill... rising...	88.	I hope this has taught you kids a lesson: kids never learn.	89.	Can't you people take the law into your own hands? I mean, we can't be policing the entire city!	90.	Tonight I'm going to party like it's on sale for $19.99!
91.	"Booooooo!" "Smithers, they're booing me!" "No, Sir, they're saying Boo-urns. Boo-urns!" "Are you saying Boo or Boo-urns?" "BOOOOOOOO!" "I was saying Boo-urns..."	92.	"Homer, is this how you pictured married life?" "Yeah, pretty much, except we drove around in a van solving mysteries."	93.	"You can't impound my spirit."	94.	I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.	95.	I'm going to the back seat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes!
96.	I've never felt so accepted in all my life. These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined.	97.	I want the answers now or eventually!	98.	Kids, kids. I'm not going to die. That only happens to bad people.	99.	Note to self: Stop. Doing. Anything.	100.	Woohoo! I'm drenched in blood!

*****

Vampires: Los Muertos

#92. She Need the Money Real Bad. PG-13. Please bring my son home for Christmas, Senor Bliss. You decent man. You and Senor Rodrigo sleep in same bed, we look other way. Derek/Rodrigo.

*****

The Ring w/ SPN, Miracles, and LHotP crossovers
(A multi-chapter fic set in the Ring/Ringu universe. Masterlist.)

#26. She Just Wanted to be Heard, Day 41: Beings of Thule. PG-13. Sam and Meredith serve witness to one of the most traumatic moments in the lives of the Metternich twins. Meredith is pulled into one of their visions, one she cannot escape without Sam's help. X-over w/ SPN. Sam/OFC, Brady/OFC.

*****

Miracles (Layers)

#96 I've never felt so accepted in all my life. These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined: Layers Within Layers, That One. PG. Four times Alva surprised Paul, and one time he didn't.

*****

Miracles (The Lesson)

#4 That'll learn 'im to bust my tomater: The Lesson. NC-17. Alva/Paul. Alva and Paul battle an incubus who invades the SQ office. They are convinced that they've killed it, but it lives, and possesses Paul.

*****

Miracles (Polarity)

#62 Woohoo!: Polarity. NC-17. Alva/Paul. Paul's chakra become unbalanced, and Alva must give him a polarity treatment, which requires him to put his hands on Paul. All over Paul.

*****

Miracles (Saner Times)

#51 So... do you like............ stuff?: Saner Times. NC-17. Alva/Paul. An alternate conclusion to You Can't Help Who You Are. What if Paul had opened the door to Alva instead of shutting him out?

*****

Miracles/Supernatural (Brokeback Mothman)

#97 I want the answers now or eventually!: Ask Tommy. PG-13. Alva tries to convince Paul to contact Tommy through a Ouija board before he carries out his other plan.

#9 Pain is the cleanser, pain is the cleanser!: Psychomantium. PG-13. The psychomantium that Paul and Alva build in the SQ office proves to be just as dangerous as Alva warned, when used improperly.

#28 This is like something out of that twilighty show about that zone: Go Straight to Hell, Do Not Pass Go, Do Not Collect $200. PG-13. A man runs into the SQ office with a demonic board game, begging the crew to play it with him so he can rescue his daughter from Hell.

#17 Oh, why does my death keep coming back to haunt me?: We Were the Dead. PG. The members of SQ help recover some people who have disappeared in a house haunted by a dead psychic.

#50 Dying tickles!: Persistence of Memory. PG. Alva is finally ready to tell Paul the secret he's been keeping, but he must first race against an entity who wants to take that secret from him.

#29 "Grandpa, how do you sleep at night?!"
"They drug us.": You Can't Help Who You Are. PG-13. A policewoman from Alva's past comes for a visit, and recognizes Paul as a man who was found wandering in Mountaineer, Vermont, at the same time Alva was there. At that time, Alva was dealing with a case that involved the infamous Mothman.

#19 Bed goes up, bed goes down, bed goes up, bed goes down: Fate is an Engineer. NC-17. Paul/Dean. Paul Callan and Dean Winchester meet under circumstances that have been engineered for reasons they cannot currently fathom.

#38 For lucky best wash use Mr. Sparkle. He banishes dirt to the land of wind and ghosts!: Fate is an Engineer: The Lost Scenes. Rated R. Sam takes a stand against the Mothman, while Dean and Paul do laundry the metrosexual way.

#66 Hello Smithers, you're quite good at turning me on: Pavlovian Dog. NC-17. Dean/Paul. Dean can't stop thinking about Paul, and calls him up. What he does during that phone call makes Paul question whether or not Dean may be too much for him to handle.

#23 Hot stuff, comin' throoooough...: Unspoken. NC-17. Dean must tell Paul a secret that may change their relationship forever.

#34 Attempted murder! Now honestly, what is that? Do they give a Nobel Prize for attempted chemistry?: The Darkness, It Wants. Hard R. Dean/Paul. Sam has visions that explain why Chad Goodwell murdered so many of the "God is Nowhere" people, and who twisted him into the killer he became.

Chp 1: #1, Chp 2: #30, Chp 3: #47, Chp 4: #49, Chp 5: #31, Chp 6: #10, Chp 7: #69, Chp 8: #87, Chp 9: #41, Chp 10: #5, Chp 11: #45, Chp 12: #37, Chp 13: #74, Chp 14: #3, Chp 15: #78: No One Mourns the Wicked. NC-17. Miracles/Supernatural/Scream. Dean comes to the realization that the resemblance between Paul Callan and Billy Loomis is significant to the coming Apocalypse, so he tells SQ about the relationship he had with him in 1995 and how he tried to save Billy from his downward spiral into infamy.

#18 When are they gonna get to the fireworks factory?!: "Beloved Sin." Rated R. Dean/Paul, Ruby/Mr Friendly. The Relic must die.

*****

Miracles/Supernatural (Plastic Dashboard Jesus)

#13 "You can do it Otto, you can do it Otto. Help each other out, that'll be our motto."
"Make this spare, I give you free gelato."
"Then back to my place where I will get you blotto."
"Domo arigato, Mister Roboto!": The Generation of 1954. Rated R. John Winchester, Mary Campbell, and Theresa Callan are all members of the Yellow-Eyed Demon's generation of 1954. What will happen when they are pitted against each other in Cold Oak?

*****

Miracles/Supernatural (Little Black Spot)

#24 Sweetie, you seem blue. Did the last of something die?: There's a Little Black Spot on the Sun Today. NC-17. Girl!Dean/Sam. While working a case involving a sacred box called The Law, Deanne reunites with her brother at college. Their reunion only complicates the job.

*****

Supernatural (Comparison Contrast)

#7 Stupid, sexy Flanders!: Comparison Contrast. NC-17. Girl!Dean/Bela. What "Red Sky at Morning" could have been if Dean had been born a girl.

*****

Supernatural (Kerry's 'verse)

#14 MY EYES! THE GOGGLES DO NOTHING!: Tuck Those Ribbons Under Your Helmet. NC-17. Winsister/Castiel, Winsister/Ruby, Winsister/Dean, Winsister/Sam, brief Winsister/Adam, Sam/Dean/Castiel. Kerry Winchester may've never been meant for the hunting life. The hardest thing, though, is being in love with a multi-dimensional wavelength that may never love her back.

*****

Supernatural (Seize the Day)

#71 "Let's just agree to disagree."
"I don't agree to that."
"Neither do I.": Seize the Day, Suffer the Night. NC-17. Winsister 'verse. Today is the longest day in Dean Winchester's life.

*****

Supernatural (Hidden Journal)

#54 What is your fascination with my forbidden closet of mystery?: Hidden Journal. PG. AU for "Hunted." What did their father tell Dean before he died? The answer may be more than he or Sam can handle.

*****

Supernatural (Krypt Key)

#61 I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T! I mean S-M-A-R-T...: The Quest for the Krypt Key. Rated R. Azazel hires a Super Genius to off the Winchesters. Crack!fic.

*****

General SPN 'verse

#95 I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes!: "That a Boy, Clarence." NC-17. Meg/Castiel. Even angels, it seemed, had an ego.

*****

Pain n' Longing 'Verse

#70 "Maybe there is no moral to this story." "Nah. It's just a bunch of stuff that happened.": "Pain and Longing." Rated R. "November Rain" -GNR (Music Video)/Supernatural Fusion/Xover. Fictional Axl/Fictional Slash (Unrequited), Fictional Axl/Fictional Stephanie Seymour. Saul made a promise he wasn't sure he could keep. "If you find something that needs killing, I'll be your hunting partner, okay? You're my bud 'til the end. We'll figure it out together."

*****

Supernatural/Paranormal Activity/Surprise Fandom

#12 But Aquaman, you cannot marry a woman without gills! You're from two different worlds!: What is the Distance Between a Bullet and a Gun. Rated R. The Winchesters and Castiel swoop in to help Micah and Katie with their demon problem, but they may be the ones who are caught off guard.

*****

My So-Called Life

#88 I hope this has taught you kids a lesson: kids never learn: Squeeze my Hand as Hard as It Hurts. NC-17. Angela/Sharon. After another botched attempt at sex with Jordan, Angela seeks solace in a friend.

*****

Dark Angel

#57 Iron helps us play!: Piano Lessons. Rated R. Alec/Rachel. Gem's questions about where Alec learned to play the piano bring up one of his steamier memories of Rachel Berrisford.

*****

Degrassi High

#6 You mean I shaved my bikini zone for nothing?: Dumb Jerks. Hard R. Spike/Liz. The girls discuss boys over girls and girls over boys, and it leads to something they didn't expect.

*****

Scream

#65 The dead have risen... and they're voting Republican...: Certain Rules. Rated R. The first time Martha Meeks heard her dead brother's voice speaking to her from the grave, she was in her third year of college. The second time, Randy asked her to return to Stu Macher's house to uncover Billy and Stu's last secret.

*****

47/100